Well, that’s the point: You ‘expected’ your mind to be ‘calm’, and when your mind don’t do it what you want, you frustrated. Meditation shouldn’t be about ‘forcing’ your mind to be calm, but to let it calm, naturally. Like the muddy water in the glass, when you left it still enough, the silt will go the bottom, and the water’s clear.
What you might do instead, other than focus your mind in your body somewhere(or your breathe) is just ‘observe’ your mind as it is, like when you observe other people. Is your mind confusing?, can’t stop thinking?, fine, be whatever it want. Is your mind calm?, that’s fine, too, but don’t expect it to be calm forever, because it won’t, and that’s also fine. You don’t judge it, you don’t expect what you want to feels because you heard other people said that. You just observe it with non-judgemental, neutral feeling.
In fact, don’t even care about how long you’ve practice it, because that also raise the expectation ‘Why did my mind is not calm even after months+ of practice?’ and it’ll pressure you to force your mind to calm even more. Some day you feel good, some day you feel sleepy, some day you confusing, and that’s ok
— you just did it, everyday.
My mentor said that your mind is like growing a tree, you can’t force it to grow into giant tree instantly. You just water it, everyday. The change is not even noticeable, but after awhile when you look back, you’ll see how much the plant growth.
The peaceful feeling will come naturally when your mind is ready enough.
What you might do instead, other than focus your mind in your body somewhere(or your breathe) is just ‘observe’ your mind as it is, like when you observe other people. Is your mind confusing?, can’t stop thinking?, fine, be whatever it want. Is your mind calm?, that’s fine, too, but don’t expect it to be calm forever, because it won’t, and that’s also fine. You don’t judge it, you don’t expect what you want to feels because you heard other people said that. You just observe it with non-judgemental, neutral feeling.
In fact, don’t even care about how long you’ve practice it, because that also raise the expectation ‘Why did my mind is not calm even after months+ of practice?’ and it’ll pressure you to force your mind to calm even more. Some day you feel good, some day you feel sleepy, some day you confusing, and that’s ok
— you just did it, everyday.
My mentor said that your mind is like growing a tree, you can’t force it to grow into giant tree instantly. You just water it, everyday. The change is not even noticeable, but after awhile when you look back, you’ll see how much the plant growth.
The peaceful feeling will come naturally when your mind is ready enough.
Good luck mate!