I can't say I've ever tipped based on service and it's a hilarious and depressing falsehood that anyone believes this is what tipping is for. We tip to compensate for the owner-biased, dysfunctional society we have the fortune to be born into.
That said, I rarely eat out anymore, and when I do get food I order takeout. The obsession with service when I don't really give a damn about it has basically destroyed my desire to sit down in a restaurant and pay even more to have my water occasionally refilled. The constant "thank you"s and "how's the food" and pushing menu items on me is basically the opposite of how I'd prefer to spend my time eating in a restaurant. Just bring the food and a water pitcher and leave me alone, please!
If we got rid of tipping and paid restaurant employees fairly, then this:
> The constant "thank you"s and "how's the food" and pushing menu items on me is basically the opposite of how I'd prefer to spend my time eating in a restaurant
should mostly go away, I think.
(I eat out all of the time and am 100% with you. It's SO MUCH BETTER outside of the United States. Restaurants by and large don't have TVs (pubs/bars do, but it's usually one or two, not SEVEN THOUSAND of them, in every angle). You only see servers when you order your food, when you receive your food, and when you pay. They don't pretend to be your friends or whatever. You're there to eat; they're there to serve; the relationship is understood. They also don't ask for tips and will usually not accept it if you try, unless you're in a touristy area, BECAUSE THEY ARE FAIRLY PAID AND FIGHT TO PRESERVE THAT RIGHT. And I say this as someone who tips 50-100% when I go out.)
Whether any one specific patron tips with it in mind, the incentive is still there in general. Sometimes people have bad experiences, and they don't tip better than average. Sometimes they have good experiences and tip well. The wait staff aren't stupid, and they're there to make money. Of course there's an incentive.
That said, I rarely eat out anymore, and when I do get food I order takeout. The obsession with service when I don't really give a damn about it has basically destroyed my desire to sit down in a restaurant and pay even more to have my water occasionally refilled. The constant "thank you"s and "how's the food" and pushing menu items on me is basically the opposite of how I'd prefer to spend my time eating in a restaurant. Just bring the food and a water pitcher and leave me alone, please!