I think it’s also important to establish a culture in which differences are accepted.
One thing that has solidified for me reading through the post and the comments here, is that we have been focusing on symptoms instead of underlying dynamics. My idea is that the feeling that, "It's not safe to be yourself" is not a symptom of racism, but rather that racism is an overt symptom of toxic group dynamics that create the sense, "It's not safe to be yourself."
Human beings have finely tuned machinery for negotiating social situations and the "it's not safe" sense seems to be one of these mechanisms. Often, there are subtle (and not so subtle) things happening within a group dynamic that signal that it's implicitly ok to haze/denigrate/vilify members of outgroups. The original post illustrates some of these. Overt toxic racism is one signal of this. "Ironic jokes" can be another. People volunteering stories of the stupidity of members of opposing political groups can be another. The real pathology is the underlying acceptability and utility of aggrandizing yourself through the stereotypical denigration of others.
I don't think a focus on matching overt patterns of behavior and verbal utterances really get to the heart of this matter. It's really the group dynamic that send the message, "It's alright to throw certain kinds of people under the bus." I think this is very significant. For one thing, it brings to mind the idea that creating this sort of atmosphere is counter productive to preventing it.
But, putting up with racist and sexist jokes is ridiculous. I think that she would have been happier if she made it clear that she was fun and easy to get along with and willing to do activities like gaming with people and to be social. But, she should draw the line at dealing with some types of behavior.
No disagreement. However, I think this also gets to heart of the matter. "Political Correctness" that just stops at the mechanical sanctioning after pattern matching certain kinds of speech is no more than an intervention in an extreme case. It's like throwing sandbags on top of a broken levy or putting more oil in your engine when the light comes on. There is another underlying dynamic at work. Putting up with racist and sexist jokes is ridiculous. However, so is only treating such symptoms. Both building community through finding ways to bond and becoming more aware as a culture of group dynamics and the psychology of "otherness" is what we need going forward. (In the context of the op's described HR intervention, the action was a band-aid that not only ignored a deeper underlying issue, but even put the false remedy on the wrong party.)
One thing that has solidified for me reading through the post and the comments here, is that we have been focusing on symptoms instead of underlying dynamics. My idea is that the feeling that, "It's not safe to be yourself" is not a symptom of racism, but rather that racism is an overt symptom of toxic group dynamics that create the sense, "It's not safe to be yourself."
Human beings have finely tuned machinery for negotiating social situations and the "it's not safe" sense seems to be one of these mechanisms. Often, there are subtle (and not so subtle) things happening within a group dynamic that signal that it's implicitly ok to haze/denigrate/vilify members of outgroups. The original post illustrates some of these. Overt toxic racism is one signal of this. "Ironic jokes" can be another. People volunteering stories of the stupidity of members of opposing political groups can be another. The real pathology is the underlying acceptability and utility of aggrandizing yourself through the stereotypical denigration of others.
I don't think a focus on matching overt patterns of behavior and verbal utterances really get to the heart of this matter. It's really the group dynamic that send the message, "It's alright to throw certain kinds of people under the bus." I think this is very significant. For one thing, it brings to mind the idea that creating this sort of atmosphere is counter productive to preventing it.
But, putting up with racist and sexist jokes is ridiculous. I think that she would have been happier if she made it clear that she was fun and easy to get along with and willing to do activities like gaming with people and to be social. But, she should draw the line at dealing with some types of behavior.
No disagreement. However, I think this also gets to heart of the matter. "Political Correctness" that just stops at the mechanical sanctioning after pattern matching certain kinds of speech is no more than an intervention in an extreme case. It's like throwing sandbags on top of a broken levy or putting more oil in your engine when the light comes on. There is another underlying dynamic at work. Putting up with racist and sexist jokes is ridiculous. However, so is only treating such symptoms. Both building community through finding ways to bond and becoming more aware as a culture of group dynamics and the psychology of "otherness" is what we need going forward. (In the context of the op's described HR intervention, the action was a band-aid that not only ignored a deeper underlying issue, but even put the false remedy on the wrong party.)